Fw: [Corrado-L] funny stuff

[Kathy Teulie <104372.1061@compuserve.com>]

Yes, this is my life, So...  So... How did you know?
BTW I only have 4 cars and I need the F1 books.
No kids yet so no need for the braces for da kid.
I sold the  lawn mower too. I am still looking for the
 house with the 5 car garage with 220v.
Well I am not so average after all.

Doug
87 16v Scirocco (not  street legal)
81 8v Scirocco (not street legal)
90 Passat WGN  (not street legal)
96 GSR 

Message text written by "Alex Ting"
>from the corrado list........

(see, sometimes there are funny guys on that list)


Alex Ting
Account Manager
Millennium Solutions Group, Inc.
575 Menlo Dr. #4
Rocklin, CA  95765

Phone:  888.801.2001 ext. 228 or 916.630.2001
Fax:  916.630.2000
email:  alex@millenniumsolutions.net
icq #19613213
-----Original Message-----
From: VWMSport@aol.com <VWMSport@aol.com>
To: corrado-l@corrado-club.com <corrado-l@corrado-club.com>
Date: Wednesday, August 04, 1999 4:44 PM
Subject: [Corrado-L] funny stuff


>
>-You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
>-You take your helmet along when you go to a car dealership for a
>test-drive.
>-Every time you go to the grocery store you feel
>compelled to beat your previous best time.
>-You think it's normal to have the outside edge of your
>tires worn down. If fact, you prefer it because you have
>"better" traction now.
>-When something falls off of your car, you wonder how
>much weight you just saved.
>-When you hear 'overcooked it,' instead of food you
>think 'off the track.'
>-You thoroughly enjoy showing the tailgater behind how
>to drive around a highway off-ramp.
>-You once had an argument with your wife over whether
>you should pay the mortgage on time or get those new
>heads while they were on sale.
>-You push your cart through a proper line in the grocery
>store.
>-You've paid $4.00 a gallon for gas without complaining.
>-You bought a tow vehicle instead of braces for your kid.
>-You and your wife go house hunting and you never
>actually get inside the house because you're checking
>out the garage for 220v.
>-You sit in your car in the dark out in your garage and
>make car noises and shift and practice your heel and
>toe, while waiting for your motor to get back from the
>machine shop.
>-Your wife doesn't understand why you need three sets of
>tires for your car.
>-Your garage holds more cars than your house has
>bedrooms.
>-You have car parts in your cubicle at work.
>-You're registered for wedding gifts at Edlebrock and
>Griggs.
>-Your Christmas list begins with another set of BFG R1s
>and aluminum rack bushings and your 'significant other'
>knows what these are.
>-Your home library consists of auto parts catalogs,
>books written by F1 drivers, anything about Carroll
>Shelby, and 400 car magazines.
>-Your family brings the couch into the garage so they
>can spend some time with you.
>-You complain when cars in front of you on highway
>off-ramps don't stay on the line, causing your exit
>speed to drop.
>-A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you
>query, "Synthetic or organic?" and they reply, "Corn."
>-You refer to the corner down the street from your house
>as "Turn One."
>-You always late apex the intersection and try to pass a
>few cars coming out.
>-You can't stand anyone telling others how to drive. Of
>course, you are the best.
>-You will gladly pay up to $8 for a quart of engine oil.
>-You hate long distance driving vacations, but you will
>gladly drive 800 miles to the race track.
>-You think that traction control and ABS are for those
>who can't drive.
>-You save broken car parts as " mementos".
>-You've tried synthetic oil and racing gas in your lawn
>mower.
>-You've tweaked your riding lawn mower to improve
>its cornering ability.
>-Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have timeslips.
>-You would choose a rollbar over air conditioning if it
>were an option.
>-White smoke coming out from under your tires is a
>common sight.
>-You know the "racing line" of every turn in your daily
>commute.
>-After you tell your wife where you'd like to go on your
>vacation she answers: "Why... is there a race there?"
>-You have race shops programmed on your speed dialer.
>-You own five cars and only one of them is street legal.
><


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