Re: Where is Dread Scott? UPDATE!!

["Christian Els" <tiAn@usiw.net>]

This is the funniest thing I have ever read on this list. Right on, brother
Meze!


Christian Els
1987 16V


----- Original Message -----
From: "Shawn C Meze" <skerocdriver@juno.com>
To: <scirocco-l@scirocco.org>
Sent: Sunday, 23 December, 2001 09:56
Subject: Where is Dread Scott? UPDATE!!


> Mr. Dread rolled into my abode LATE this afternoon. So late indeed that
> his chaperone  (Doug Toulie) had to leave to attend a very important
> tupperware party. Or was it a macrame party. He instructs that ya know. I
> digress...)
>
> So, Mr. Dread greatly desired to goto one of those 3rd world countries to
> complete his 3 country mission of his. Apparently, just driving down to
> the border and seeing a mexican or 1000 wasn't enough. He HAD to go
> across and have a shot of Cuerve Gold and choke down a Cheeze Enchiladas.
> I noted that all of these things I have within my own cupboards of my own
> home. Nope, not good enough, he had to go down south himself.
>
> So we get down there and park at the border and take a bus across.
> (Because NO Scirocco should ever cross the evil empires border. Unless of
> course its got a cracked frame and you plan to report it stolen. Then its
> OK.) Its a whole 5 minutes to get to the bus station. Then were alone, in
> a 3rd world country. Scotts loving it. Im scared.
>
> We stroll down the busy busting streets of beautiful downtown Tijuana.
> Scotts loving it, im still scared. We note the beautiful intricate
> details of the local architecture and the piles of mud and dirt that come
> from some place that, has dirt and mud. Hmm. Im still scared, Scotts a
> walking tooth commercial.
>
> Am old man slithers out of a dark doorway and whispers to Scott.. "you
> want young girls"? Scotts like, HELLZ YEAH! Where do we go? And im like,
> "WE"?
>
> 5 minutes later he emerged with yet a larger grin on his face and said,
> man, I never knew a 13 yr old could be so good. That's the best 10 bucks
> I ever spent AND, its perfectly legal here! And im like, Whatever...
>
> So, after his moment of pleasure, were looking for a place to eat and get
> a drink. We find the loudest place in the city. We both said we wanted
> this stereo system in our cars. We got quite good at reading lips too.
>
> We toasted Mexico for giving us such a great place to spend an afternoon
> in and gleefully downed a couple shots of the Gold stuff, minus the worm.
> Then we dined on the finest cheeze enchilada's that Mexico had to offer.
> I reminded Scott that I had a couple of frozen enchiladas in the freezer
> at home that tasted WAY better but you know, he was all into the whole
> experience thing. After the last morsel of greasy, unrecognizable goo and
> tortilla which stuff we devoured, we left to head back to the good ol'
> USA! I was still scared, but felt there was a chance to make it back
> alive. Yes, I could see myself with my roc again! I still had hope! Scott
> was still smiling but by now I think that 6th shot of the gold stuff
> might of had something to do with it.
>
> So, were again walking down the streets of beautiful downtown TJ.
> Apparently busses can drive wherever they need to. One decided that Scott
> was in his way and ran him over. Yup, ran him over. He said his arm hurt
> a little and his pants were torn. What I saw was, a compound fracture,
> but I wasn't gonna say anything until he realized the truth about his
> injury.
>
> We got all the way to the bus station when this old lady stopped Scott
> and ratted him out about his broken arm. DAMN HER! I knew we could of
> made it back if he could of just not seen all the blood. The bone was
> only poking thru a little and he has a huge pain threshold which
> impressed me quite alot. Or was that the Gold in effect? Hmm. Well, now
> that he knew that he was all hurt and stuff, I knew my chances of getting
> back to the USA were bad. Damn that old lady!
>
> So now he wants to go to a hospital to stop the bleeding. I mean come on,
> were in Mexico! They don't have any of those here. Lets get back to the
> US. He's like, Nope. DAMN that old lady!
>
> So a cop stops us and accuses me of fighting with him and breaking his
> arm. We told him about the bus ordeal and he doesn't believe me. So, $400
> later, were out of jail and we were both taken to what they call a
> hospital. They gave him a shot of morphine because the Gold was
> apparently wearing off by now. While he was in the back room waiting for
> the bone to be set,  I could hear him crying, "Tosha, man, you stood me
> up"! Soon afterwords, they set the bone and stitched him all up. Finally
> we got to leave and head back to the border.
>
> We get back to the bus station and Scott looses his ticket. So he had to
> buy another one. Then, he forgets to buy ME a ticket while I waited in
> line for US. So he runs back to get another ticket. We finally get on the
> bus to freedom. THANK GOD!
>
> Now, what's funny is, it was a 5 minute bus ride from the parking lot in
> the US to the bus station in TJ. It took us over an hour to get back to
> the parking lot. Talk about being scared. I thought they were taking us
> deeper into Mexico!
>
> We finally get back to the car. I missed my car. It fired right up and we
> get into traffic. Then the red LED lights up. Its hotter than shit! I hop
> out and open the hood to find the fan plug had fallen off. I install it
> and it runs right away. Cools down. Good. Then the alt fan belt is
> squealing. Great. The tab on the head broke and I have nothing to adjust
> the alternator to. Great! Somehow we make it back to my place. And now
> he's sleeping in my chair next to me. He's a little cuter than TBerk ya
> know.
>
> So, looks like he heads out to home tomorrow morning. He can chime in on
> his part of the story when he gets home. I think his fingers still work
> OK.
>
> Well, only some of this is true. Everything else I made up.
>
>
> Shawn Méze
> 86' Jetta GLi 8V     84' Scirocco 8V    88' Corvette -SS 30- 2001 SDR
> Solo2 Champion
> 82' Scirocco GTi -FSP 54-     79' "Project FSP Scirocco"
> The Fastest, Quickest, Cleanest and best looking Scirocco(s) in all of
> San Diego!
> http://www.Geocities.com/MotorCity/Speedway/1308/index.htm
>
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